How to break bad habits | The Complete Guide

Human lives are nothing but an accumulation of thousands of habits. Every bad habit is a vote for a lousy life. It is essential to know how to break bad habits and form better ones. This post will give you a complete guide to breaking your bad habits to change your life for the better.

How are habits formed?

Every habit we have in our daily life consists of four stages:

Cue - The initiating factor in the habit. There is always something that initiates your routine in the first place, e.g., boredom, which creates the craving for entertainment.
Craving: The urge you feel after the cue, the inner reason to perform the habit, e.g., you do not crave turning on the Tv; you crave the entertainment.
Routine: This is the pattern of the habit. When the cue is triggered, you perform the routine, e.g., turning on the TV.
Reward: It is the mental or physical satisfaction you get after performing the routine, e.g., stress relief & entertainment after watching Tv.

90% of the actions that we do in our daily life is nothing but the repetition of habits. Each habit undergoes these four stages.

Now that you know how a habit is formed, let us see how to break bad habits and vanish them forever.

Identify the Cues

The first step to changing your habit is identifying the cues; the small triggers that initiate your habit. Clear your head and ask yourself the following questions:

What do you feel just before performing the habit?
What mood are you in a while performing it?
Which time of day does it mostly occur?
Map out the exact environment and situation.

Write down the answers in a note-book, phone, or anywhere easily accessible. These are the possible cues to your bad habit. . If you have got the answers to these questions, you have done the hard part. Next time you feel any of these triggers of emotion, mood, situation, and time, you should be aware that you might perform your routine. Reading the cues once in a while will make you even more conscious.

Change your identity

To change a behavioral pattern completely, you need to change who you are. You need to envision yourself as a new person who never performs certain bad habits. Let me give you an example: if you consider yourself a smoker who is trying to give up smoking, you will eventually fall back to your identity. The only way to completely give up smoking is by thinking of yourself as a non-smoker. To eradicate a habit from the roots, you need to set your mindset to be a new person.

Identify strong reasons for breaking bad habits.

A question that you will ask yourself quite a while is "Why." Your brain needs some strong reasons to fight the craving for a nobler cause. Write the reasons for breaking the bad habit and access them daily. It will strengthen your morale because now and then, you will feel like quitting.

Reduce Exposure & Increase Friction to Cues

Now that you have identified the cues. It would be best if you reduced exposure to every cue. If the cues are some physical objects, keep them hidden away from your sight. Arrange your environment in such a way that you do not have to face the triggers under any circumstances. For example: If your bad habit is checking social media every 5 minutes

Do not keep the social media account on your home screen.
Turn off the notifications of your social media account.
Keep the social media apps hidden in other folders of your account.

Replace the bad habit with a good one

The best way to change a habit is by replacing it. Keeping the cue and reward the same, replace your harmful routine with a better version of it. Replacing can turn a dangerous practice into a handy one.

For example :

If the cue is stress and the reward is stress-relief, replace your smoking or alcohol habit with video gaming.

Whenever you feel stressed, turn on your gaming console and enjoy a video game to alleviate the stress.

Replacement is possibly the best way to change a habit and make it stick for long.

| Charles Duhig, in The power of habit, says, "You can't extinguish a bad habit; you can only change it."

Keep a habit tracker:

For a habit tracker, you should consider using a calendar. Mark the dates that you succeeded in avoiding the habit and keep the calendar in front of your desk. Look at the calendar every time you sit at your desk; this will give you satisfaction seeing all the calendar checkmarks. You can also use digital habit-tracker like Notion, Habitify, Strides, and others. If you are into digital habit tracking, make sure to check out these habit trackers recommended by Thomas frank.

Keep reminding yourself

Always keep reminding your brain about the bad habits that you are trying to avoid. Keep notes in your fridge, your home screen, in your study desk, and anywhere you occasionally visit. Also, make sure to encourage yourself along with inspirational quotes alongside the reminders.

Start small

The most common mistake in the case of habits that we make is to take challenges beyond our league. We should start small. It will keep us interested and motivated to keep trying. Set goals for yourself that are achievable and not overwhelming. For example:

If you are trying to quit eating junk food, first set a mark for 15 days. Meet the goal and increase the game. Next time set a goal for 30 days.

This way breaking bad habits will be more comfortable and feel like a video game that your mind will enjoy.

Create an Accountability partner to break a bad habit

The power of accountability is sometimes ignored. Our partners, wives, husbands, friends, parents can be of great help. When you know you have to answer someone about your destructive behaviors, you are more likely to behave better and avoid bad habits.

For example: Tell your best friend that for each time you pick your nose, he/she will get 10$. In this way, your friend would be willing to point out our behavior as soon as you commit it. On the other hand, you will be aware of losing your precious dollar.

Eventually, this behavior will be automatic and will not require accountability.

Join a similar group of people

Charles Duhig, in his book " The power of habit," mentions if you start a habit with a group of people, you are more likely to develop the habit because failing would result in the loss of social status in front of peers. It might also be regarded as peer pressure.

So if you are willing to quit a habit, join a group of people who are also willing to do the same. It will create peer pressure in you, and you are more likely to succeed. Nobody wants to be the odd man in a group who has failed to meet the group's objectives.

Never Do It Twice

To err is human. Once in a while, You are likely to slip up. But set a rule for yourself; never do it twice. It would be best if you let go of the " All or nothing" mentality. Even if you slip up, your job is to get up and continue fighting against your bad habit.

Visualize yourself succeeding

It requires a great deal of internal motivation to let go of your bad habits. To strengthen your morale, now and then visualize yourself succeeding. Before going to sleep or after waking up, imagine yourself as the person you want to be. Remind your brain that there is a nobler cause for sacrificing these cravings.

Be Patient to break the bad habit.

There is a myth that it is possible to avoid or create a habit in 21 days. But that is absurd and unreal. A habit can take months to years to give up, depending upon your mental strength and discipline. Do not push yourself. Be patient with how you handle your habit & slipups. Anyone can give up a habit given the proper time and tips.

Conclusion

"Succes is the product of daily habits- not once in a lifetime transformations."

Our habits make us who we are. To change our lives, we should focus on the smallest habits and modify them for good. In a nutshell, these are the 13 ways to break bad habits :

Change your identity
Have a strong reason
Identify the cues/triggers.
Reduce exposure to cues
Start small
Replace the habit
Keep reminding yourself
Keep physical tracker
Have an accountability partner
Join a similar group of people
Never miss the habit twice.
Be patient with your habit.

Best of luck in changing your habit

What to do now?

If you feel you are more into changing your habits, you can try these two great books on habits.

Atomic Habits By James Clear

This book reflects on scientific ways to create good habits and break bad ones. James clearly explains how small patterns can transform us into entirely different human beings with greater values and performance.

The Power of Habit by Charles Duhig

This book does a very great job explaining how our habits and function. Their impact is not limited to personal lives but spread across different organizations, companies & revolutions.